Tikkende Trekkoppdager

Dikt og søppeldikt. Et livs- og dødsverk, mitt mestermakkverk

New Adventures in Broken English

PLEASE READ

Welcome to my blog
Velkommen til bloggen min
Wilkommen auf meinem Blog
Добро пожаловать на мой блог
Καλώς ήρθατε στο μπλογκ μου
Bienvenido a mi blog
Kusoo dhawow my blog
歡迎到我的博客
Welcome to Dystopia
Welcome to Utopia
Welcome to George Orwell’s 1984
Welcome to the Woodstock Festival
Welcome to Franz Kafka’s The Trial
Welcome to the War of the Worlds
Welcome to the world of Sigmund Freud
Welcome to the world of Lewis Carroll
Welcome to a Coney Island of the Mind
Welcome to walk a mile in my shoes
Welcome to infinite consciousness
Welcome to a rollercoaster
where everything (and nothing)
is about art (Art Garfunkel)
for art’s (Art Garfunkel’s) sake

– –

WHAT KEEPS YOU AWAKE AT NIGHT

To write about
what keeps me awake at night,
in a spiral of
intense negative thoughts,
I have to write with the same turmoil
that goes on in the brain.
It should be unpleasant to read it,
because it is an unpleasant experience.
People make me so mad sometimes,
I wish I was the Hulk,
I want to tear their house apart
and throw their car down the road.
If I offended you, the reader
it’s because I’m honest,
and not dishonest.
I have not been unfaithful
(maybe once or twice)
to my real feelings.

– –

PUSHING PEOPLE AWAY

Let’s celebrate that my blog is abandoned.
There have been occasional visits when I have posted a new writing.
But not anymore.
I think it was only spies to check if I was a threat to society.
Now they have even given up.
Like Emily Dickinson wrote: «I’m Nobody! Who are you?»

– –

TALKING TO MYSELF (IN BROKEN ENGLISH)

I force myself to see evil. I follow animal rescuers on youtube
and the torture done by human beings to dogs and cats are so evil
that I have to see it to understand it.
(Yes I eat meat. If you think it’s contradictory.)
In that sense, I search for darkness and depression.
I feel that darkness is the truest form of light in this world,
while bright light you have to be ignorant or in a blissful moment of joy to see.
Nature is ruthless. And humanity too, though they try to hide it
behind censorship and photoshop and politeness.
It’s not much I can do about it, but I want to suffer with the suffering,
whether it is a cat or a dog or an elephant or a person.
It’s the least I can do. I am not saying that this is the right way
but it is my way, so to speak. I just can’t help it,
I don’t want to be like the people who turn away
and want it banned because it is not what they want to see.

– –

A MOMENT OF AGGRESSION (DON’T TAKE IT TOO SERIOUSLY)

I hate people who say
that they like this poem
and that poem
but not this one or that one.
As if it is pick and choose.
My writings are not vegetables,
or fruits or TV channels,
you narrowminded boink.
If you don’t want to listen
to what I have to say,
please go and kill yourself.
I’m not gonna stand
in the way
and listen
to what is bothering you.
I’m gonna pick and choose
something I liked
that you said
and leave you alone
so you can get on
with your suicide

– –

MEIN KAMPF

It gets on my nerves.
They sit in front of the tv,
with a laptop on the lap,
a smartphone in one hand, an ipad in the other,
and they have zero acceptance for cigarettes,
drugs or alcohol, because it is addictive!
They are afraid of smoke, but not WiFi.
It is invisible.
What kind of retards are they?
I’m all for that people should live the way they want,
that’s the way I want it myself,
which these fucking nerds aren’t.
They are as intolerant as only a moron can be.
They think they represent the norm,
while in real life, they are as appealing as a crack addict.
I’d rather recommend crack, because it is your own choice
to take it,
and not because your parents bought it for Christmas
when you were five.
And years from now, they will pay the price
for this lifestyle,
whether they like it or not.
That’s life.

– –

2020

We live
in the worst period
of death and disease
in a hundred years,
despite science.
My life is rubbish.
And I’m not alone.
Everyone’s life is.
If the body is not infected
by Covid-19,
the mind is.
Millions will go bankrupt
and end up homeless,
sick and suicidal.
It’s the biggest robbery
of freedom
since nazi-Germany,
thanks to science!

– –

LET’S CELEBRATE

Let’s celebrate
the life-experienced.
Let’s celebrate people
who are interesting,
because they lived to feel,
lived to think, lived to try,
lived to laugh, and cry.
Let’s celebrate people
who didn’t waste a moment,
who didn’t waste my moment.
Let’s celebrate people
who always complain,
who never have
a peaceful moment
in their mind.
Let’s celebrate people
who are pained, and suicidal,
who are filled with life
and death.
Let’s celebrate people
who have a twinkle
in their eye,
who have a spirit
that makes me feel alive.
Let’s celebrate people
who drink to get by.

– –

TOUR GUIDE

I’m not much of a tour guide.
I can’t recommend where to travel in Norway,
as I only live there.
It’s a material world, I have to live somewhere.
If I could afford it, I would have
lived somewhere else.
Probably in Thorbjørn Egner’s Hakkebakkeskogen.
There is nothing special about it.
You have the fjords, but in reality,
it is God’s own nature.
There are some historical writers, composers and painters
like Henrik Ibsen, Edvard Munch and Edvard Grieg,
but that was a hundred years ago.
There is nothing like that now.
It’s all standardized and clinical and scientific.
Go to Norway, talk to a stranger…
If you can stand the bitchy remarks
if you happen to say something original.

– –

JUST SOME THOUGHTS

Art and music is where I actually live
in this world, spiritually and personally.
That’s what makes life meaningful,
where I can use my imagination
and live as a free man.
Science and doctors are for the physical body.
It’s a material world.
I need their medicine and the surgery.
But I love The Beatles and David Bowie
more than all the doctors
and scientists combined.
I don’t even like them, to be honest.
They are so clinical and soulless.
I don’t care who the doctor is,
just that they do their job well.

– –

THE LAST SALVATION

Doctors and dentists are made of the same antibacterium.
They are not people. They are doctors and dentists.
And if they were people once, it is irrelevant,
because they are what they do.
Life is adapted to what maintains white teeth and clean lungs.
When they talk to you, it is with a doctor’s education.
Whether at a party, on a plane, or on a holiday,
you sit in the doctor’s office or in the dental chair
when you talk to a doctor or a dentist.
That Keith Richards’ teeth rot because of excess they understand.
That the music was created by excess, that life reflects the art,
they do not understand. Everyone has to exercise,
be on a sugar-free diet in smoke-free environments
and go to bed early. It is good for teeth and lungs.
That’s what the book says.
They are impressed with the aging Mick Jagger. How sporty he is.
That he has not made a good record since he was on heroin
and smoked three packs of Marlboro a day,
they find incomprehensible.
You need to organize your career for what is good
for your teeth and lungs.

– –

PRACTICALITY

Hans: I go to Elkjøp. They have good customer service.
Leif: I prefer Lefdal.
Jan: Elkjøp and Lefdal were merged into one company.
Hans: When?
Jan: In the first quarter of 2018, Lefdal and Elkjøp were merged into one company.
Leif: I did not know that.
Hans: Neither did I.
Leif: Lefdal was one of Norway’s biggest electronics and household appliance stores.
Jan: They had 19 large warehouses nationwide, and the same owner as Elkjøp Nordic.
Leif: I thought it was 18.
Jan: No, it was 19.
Leif: Are you sure? I always thought it was 18.
Jan: I’m sure. It was 19.
Leif: It surprises me. You learn something new every day.
Hans: Elkjøp has low prices.
Jan: I bought an oven there.
Leif: My brother bought a fridge there.
Jan: My fridge comes from Thorn.
The boy with the thorn in his side: What’s buzzing?
Fly on the wall: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

– –

KILL YOURSELF

When you have to strike fear
into people’s hearts
to make them listen to you,
you should not be a spokesman.
You are too ugly, inside out.
You want power, and influence,
but you have no charisma.
No one listens to you,
and therefore you create laws
that everyone must follow,
and scare people with punishment
if they do not listen.
You are incompetent as a human being,
but an authority…
You want to be the boss!
Heartless, soulless.
Your only contribution to life
is the day you die.
Then the lack of your presence
is fulfilled.

– –

MY PREDICTION

The 1960s was a phenomenon. A counterculture. It was a tidal wave.
Now it is back to normal. Before David Bowie and The Beatles,
popular music was syrupy (but well crafted) Hollywood productions,
Fred Astaire singing «Cheek to Cheek».. and even before that
it was cabaret (Sophie Tucker) and brass band music (Black Dyke Mills Band.
They recorded a song with Paul McCartney in 1968. The very cool «Thingumybob»).
Some claim that jazz was popular music, but Miles Davis said jazz
is America’s classical music. It was jazzy pop (Nat King Cole) that was popular,
which was on the charts, not bebop (Thelonious Monk), it was performed
in the clubs (on 52nd Street). We leave it in this context. Brass band music..
which was popular around 1900, had a huge sound, a big noise, that has a lot
in common with modern computerized popular music. Catchy for those who likes it,
but unbearable for everyone else. The music does not have finesse,
it is not intricate. It’s a SOUND that overflows the room. It has not become
a popular classic, the popularity died with the generation who marched to it,
and is nowadays only heard on special occasions. I suspect that popular music
of today (circa 2019) will take the same path. It is not made of durability.
It is not art. Bowie was a Picasso of popular music. It was evident already
in 1977. There is no room for stars of that caliber in the era we are now.
Not on the charts anyway. It’s showbiz again. The musicians do not improvise,
they accompany.. the singers and the dancers. This is my prediction:
It will go down the drain with my poetry (and yours). In a hundred years,
Kanye West be will be as famous as I am now. (Excuse me if I’m wrong.
I’m not a fortune teller.)

– –

TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN

Wikipedia is not fake news, it’s fake facts,
with hidden agendas like the anti-smoking propaganda.
Every dead celebrity who was ever photographed
with a cigarette in hand, is presented with
HE WAS A SMOKER AND NOW HE IS DEAD.
Funnily enough, all the people who did not smoke
in the heydays of Dean Martin and Robert Mitchum,
they are dead too.
On YouTube videos with dead celebrities who smoked,
it is packed with commentary about how he was a smoker.
It’s a pattern. It’s not users who write this,
it’s the employees. And interesting enough,
YouTube, Google, Wikipedia… Is all the same network.
I remember how Hollywood Movies suddenly were full of
actors who said things like SMOKING WILL KILL YOU,
when the smoking bans happened in the early 2000s.
A few years later, when global warming became a thing,
it was noteworthy that disaster movies had a boost.
Al Gore, Bill Clinton, Michael Bloomberg…
all you wealthy smoking ban tycoons associated with
the registered sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.
Tobacco will never die, but you will.

– –

GOOD RIDDANCE

In my youth,
I thought it was sad when people died,
it creeped me out to read about murders
in the newspapers, but not anymore.
Modern people are not made of emotions to be missed.
They are too staged and self-conscious,
detached from reality.
They represent self-love, not love.
And everyone is alike, a mass-produced product for sale.
The personality is erased.
And they have chosen it themselves.
They want to be like everyone else.
It’s not sad when they die. It was sad when they lived.
When I die, there will be no funeral.
My friends are the record collection.
That’s where heart and soul unfold.
I miss John Lennon, Elvis Presley and David Bowie
more than any person I’ve ever met.
The exception is the dog Scott.
I’d rather not have a grave.
All the shitholes who are buried in the cemeteries.
All my life I have longed to get rid of them.
I do not wish to be gathered six feet under
with a tombstone on top.

– –

MODERN TIMES

So you «don’t want to complain
about modern times like an old man».
I see. Homelessness, mass shootings,
the opioid epidemic,
a rise in suicide…
Don’t you think it’s worth complaining about?
Don’t you want to change the world?
What was good about the hippies
was their complaints about status quo.
The same with punk rock.
It was young people who wanted to be free.
But if you want to be a puppet
and defined by the governments,
go ahead but you are not worthy
of rock ‘n’ roll.

– –

OPEN-MINDEDNESS

It is no more close-minded not to listen to new music
then it is to not listen to vintage jazz or blues,
orchestral music, medieval folk music, classical music,
cabaret, Sousa Marches, brass band music, big band music,
Tuvan throat singing, avant garde, music of North Korea,
yodeling, Hindustani classical music, Russian folk songs,
Chinese classical music, joik, rockabilly, etc. etc.
If you do not listen to all these types of music,
you are still close-minded. People who think they are
open-minded are happily unaware of all the music
they have never heard of.

– –

THE REAL DEAL

Kim Deal is as gigantic as Kurt Cobain.
She is not so easily defined,
she is a lo-fi musician,
she does not prepare
a new studio album every three years,
it’s a single here and an EP there, gigs,
it’s a scattered body of work,
unlike Nirvana it’s not there in your face,
it’s not marketable,
most of her career is not even a career,
it’s projects, as a member of a band,
but if you listen to her work
as a bass player for the Pixies
and as a lead singer in her own bands
The Breeders and The Amps
and her solo singles,
she is a musical magician
with a hypnotic quality in her voice.
As a non-American, I would call her
a world-class national treasure.

– –

THE EDGE

I love to write with an edge. A bite.
Growing up in Norway,
I’ve learned that being angry is wrong.
If you are angry, it is your own fault.
And you are supposed to stand in the corner
and be ashamed of yourself.
It’s what I learned in school.
It is accepted to be mean,
but aggression is forbidden.
You are not allowed to scream in frustration.
You are not allowed to hate someone’s guts.
I always meet people with peace and love,
it’s the least I can do,
but there are many assholes in this world.
And plenty of them lives in Norway.
If you meet people with a smile, you may soon be disappointed.
They will see that you have the guard down
and use it against you.
Most assholes aren’t even aggressive.
They are slippery.
You slip on them and bang your head on the floor.
Some say that poetry cannot be aggressive,
but they can fuck off and die,
because they are assholes
and they will say the same thing
in any given situation
to protect themselves
from criticism of their disgusting self.
Poetry is not to their ownership.

– –

ROBERT WYATT

Let’s celebrate Robert Wyatt. He was not a favorite in my youth
like David Bowie and Prince, or in my childhood like The Beatles.
I had vaguely heard of him. I was 30 before I got into his music.
I heard «The Soft Machine» released in 1968. It was in the late-1990s,
in a decade when programmed beats took over from drummers.
It was the new scene, but I loved bands, a backbeat, the flawed rhythmic precision
of a human being, and Soft Machine with Robert Wyatt on drums
was unlike anything I’d ever heard, even by progressive rock standards.
It was old music but new to me. It was so free spirited, and wild at heart,
the drumming was like stream of consciousness poetry.
It was never standing still, always becoming something else.
It was jazz and rock and pop but impossible to label.
It became known as the Canterbury Scene, a subgenre of progressive rock,
a scene that also includes another of my favorite bands,
Gong with Daevid Allen, who was in an early incarnation of Soft Machine.
Robert Wyatt was the lead singer and a creative force
on their first two albums, but by the fourth he was reduced
to drumming and eventually kicked out by the other members in 1971.
They wanted to play a more sophisticated form of jazz-rock,
and although it is musically good, it is Robert Wyatt that I am a fan of.
In 1973, he broke his back, and depending on a wheelchair,
he had to rearrange his music career, since he could no longer be a touring drummer.
With a little help from his friends, he recorded «Rock Bottom» in 1974.
It was a sound that was meditative and with more space to breathe
than the music he had made with Soft Machine and Matching Mole.
It launched his solo career. In the late 1970s he joined
the Communist Party of Great Britain and recorded some highly political records
mainly as a one-man band concept. A solid proof that political music works
when it comes from the individual and not from an ideology.
The songs are as personal as they are political.
«Shleep» from 1997 was a comeback to a fuller band sound
with a team of guest musicians and signalled a late-career resurgence.
I recommend for your listening experience:
«Rock Bottom» (1974) – The classic Robert Wyatt album.
«Shleep» (1997) – Wyatt has a natural psychedelic mind.
«Cuckooland» (2003) – Favorite album of Wyatt’s wife, the poet Alfreda Benge.
«The Soft Machine» (1968) – The young and restless drummer.
«Old Rottenhat» (1985) – A political peak in his music.
‘…For the Ghosts Within’ (2010) – A jazzy collaboration. His swan song.

– –

MY COMMENT

«How Your Unconscious Mind Rules Your Behaviour: TEDx Talks»

I spoke to a doctor, he was so arrogant and snotty.
He was more concerned about being my superior than communicating.
He is clinical, puritanical on the outside, but when he talks,
it is with a rotten smell of contempt. My subconsious mind
want to put him right but my conscious mind pretend like nothing
and because I dislike him I try to cover it up by being too nice.
I’m getting tense but I’m not there to argue,
swords and armor are left at home. I’m vulnerable.
The doctor knows this and takes advantage of the situation.
When I come home, I hate myself for it. I want to punch myself
for not punching him. It has become a vicious circle.
My subconscious mind hate doctors, with honorable exceptions,
I think they are talentless evil freaks with no social skills,
they don’t care about people, they just want to bend your broken arm
and hear you say ouch! Still I need them for my medical prescriptions
and an application for a disability pension,
because I have a neurological problem. I play the courtesy game.
I’m sick of it. I write all these unreadable bathsit insane poems
about my experiences with harassment in the Norwegian welfare system
instead of something imaginative and entertaining.
It kills my will to look at life with a sense of beauty.
All these ugly people who call themselves doctors and social workers
who stand in the way. That’s all I can see, even when I close my eyes.

– –

DARK THOUGHTS

It can be revealing
to write from experience,
like a diary.
To capture the heat of the moment.
It may represent three minutes
of inner turmoil but written down
it is available light.
People read it and think, oh, so that’s how he is!
And maybe it just represents
something I feel once in a while,
or something I went through
for a period of time.
When I go back and read what I’ve written,
it surprises me how insignificant it is.
Most of me is wordless.
Most of me is music.

– –

AT MY MOST BEAUTIFUL

I commented «he reacts to the interviewer as if he ask him questions
he hasn’t answered ten million times before, he is extremely patient that way»,
to an interview Paul McCartney did for his new picture book «Hey Grandude!»
It recieved 62 likes within the first 24 hours. 100 likes within 3 days.

– –

A BEAUTIFUL MIND

Let’s talk about Brian Wilson (in broken English).
I got into «Pet Sounds» when I was a teenager.
It was easy because it was considered a groundbreaking album.
I was just as interested in reading about music as listening to it.
I read music magazines, for better or worse maybe because The Beach Boys
was out of fashion in the 1980s,
and the only record considered essential was «Pet Sounds» from 1966.
They were seen as an oldies act of middle-aged men
in Hawaiian shirts selling the trademark of endless summer.
I was not curious about checking out The Beach Boys’ recorded output
in the 1970s, because it had a bad reputation.
In the early 1990s I got into their early records, their debut album
«Surfin’ Safari» from 1962 and the 1963 followup «Surfin’ U.S.A».
They were rereleased as twofer CDs with two original LPs on one disc.
It was kind of a corny version of 50s rock ‘n’ roll.
Formulaic but fun. It cheered you up when you were drunk.
I noticed that «Surfer Girl» released half a year later in 1963
was a bit more advanced, especially the singing, the harmonies.
They were turning into my favorite vocal group of all time,
and Brian Wilson was becoming the musical visionary he is.
They tried to break free from the surf image by recording an album
about cars with «Little Deuce Coupe». Their third album in 1963.
In 1964 and 1965, Brian Wilson was peaking as a hit composer
with famous songs like «I Get Around» and «California Girls»
and the innovative recording of «Good Vibrations» in 1966.
Most of their biggest hits I got on the 1990 compilation
«California Gold – The Very Best of The Beach Boys».

In the early 2000s, the discography of The Beach Boys
from «Surfin ‘Safari» (1962) to «The Beach Boys» (1985)
was re-released on twofer CDs, and I got hold of them all.
Many of these studio albums had been out of print for years.
It was like discovering a place I had heard a lot about,
but that was completely different when I got there.
In a good way, so to speak, it was better than the reputation.
It occurred to me that The Beach Boys are much more than
just «Pet Sounds» and their greatest hits.
Listen to the stripped down R&B of «Wild Honey» from 1967.
It’s the album they made to move on from the aborted «SMiLE» sessions.
It’s as raw as you will ever hear them.
Brian Wilson has stated that «Pet Sounds» is the best album he has made
but that «Friends» from 1968 is his favorite.
I love it too. It’s a summery breeze, psychedelic,
but the vibrations are sleepy rather than sporty.
Listen to «Sunflower» from 1970.
It’s their democratic masterpiece where all members contribute songs.
Listen to «Surf’s Up» from 1971. It’s their darkest album
featuring one of Brian Wilson’s most personal songs «’Til I Die».
Along with Paul McCartney, I consider Brian Wilson
the greatest pop composer of my time.
Let’s distinguish; John Lennon is a rocker-singer/songwriter,
Bob Dylan a folk-singer/songwriter, David Bowie an artist,
Prince a musician…
Brian Wilson and Paul McCartney are the natural successors
of George Gershwin. Maybe even Mozart. That is my opinion.

Let’s talk about Brian Wilson. He was in and out of The Beach Boys
after his mental breakdown in the late-1960s.
There are albums where he hardly contributes,
to albums where he is the creative force.
«Holland» from 1973 is a group effort with the voice of Al Jardine
sending shivers up the spine on the song-suite «California Saga».
On «Carl and the Passions – «So Tough»» from 1972,
Carl Wilson is the bandleader. It’s their hardest rocking album.
«Summer in Paradise» from 1992 is Mike Love’s The Beach Boys.
I call it an album for completists.
«The Beach Boys Love You» from 1977 was concieved
as «Brian Wilson Love You»
but the record company persuaded him to release it by The Beach boys.
Humorless twits refers to it as a showcase for Brian Wilson’s mental illness,
but there is nothing mentally ill about it.
It’s Brian Wilson’s comedy hour. He has a nonsense of humor.
«Adult/Child» was supposed to be the followup
to «The Beach Boys Love You» in the autumn of 1977,
but was rejected by the record company for not being commercially viable.
It’s essential listen for any Brian Wilson fan. Like ten years earlier,
he was getting playful with music, and the album is a total original
mashup of big band music, early synthezisers and demo recordings.
Let’s hope for an archive release. It deserves it, along with
«Sweet Insanity» (1991) and the Andy Paley collaborations.
Listening to this on the internet is not good enough.
It’s way overdue for a Brian Wilson Bootleg Series.
We demand an official release!

Let’s talk about Dennis Wilson. He was the rocker of The Beach Boys,
wild at heart, but no one sang epic balladry with more sensitivity
than Dennis Wilson and his cracked and smoky voice.
Listen to «Forever» (on «Sunflower»), «Little Bird» (on «Friends»),
and «Cuddle Up» (on «Carl and the Passions – «So Tough»»).
Listen to live versions of «You Are So Beautiful».
«Pacific Ocean Blue» from 1977 is the most essential solo album
in The Beach Boys canon.
Brian Wilson released his eponymous debut album «Brian Wilson» in 1988.
It was made in a period when he was controlled by Dr. Eugene Landy,
who also wanted credit as co-writer and co-producer of the album.
I recommend the 2014 biographical film «Love & Mercy»
for an in-depth look into their relationship.
Brian Wilson’s solo career is underrated in my opinion.
While contemporary artists like Paul McCartney and Bob Dylan
manage to top the charts with new releases,
a new album by Brian Wilson is lucky to chart at all.
Whether this is because his mental illness is not ‘marketable’
in a world that chases eternal youth, I do not know.
It was a musical event when «Brian Wilson Presents SMiLE»
came out in 2004.
In collaboration with lyricist Van Dyke Parks,
and the band Wondermints,
he had finally managed to complete a version of the work,
37 years after it was conceived.
The original recordings with The Beach Boys were released
as «The SMiLE Sessions» in 2011.

Let’s listen to Brian Wilson. Buy «No Pier Pressure» from 2015.
His latest studio album at the time of writing,
featuring the duet with Kacey Musgraves on «Guess You Had To Be There».
Listen to «Brian Wilson Reimagines Gershwin» from 2010,
and hear how he turn Gershwin into a Beach Boy.
Listen to «Orange Crate Art» by Brian Wilson and Van Dyke Parks.
Their collaborative album from 1995.
Listen to «That’s Why God Made the Radio».
The Beach Boys’ swan song from 2012.
Listen to «Lay Down Burden» from «Imagination» (1998).

– –

MEAT IS MURDER

I eat meat. I’m not proud of it,
but it tastes good.
I dislike the degradation of animals.
I do not consider myself worth more than them,
and dislike people who do. When I grew up,
I learned that cows, chickens and pigs are stupid,
that they are made to be eaten. And of course they aren’t,
they are no more made to be eaten than a human being
is made to be eaten by a crocodile.
It’s just bad luck. I consider it a flaw in the creation,
there is a lack of food, we all have to eat each other.
I admit that I eat a beautiful creature
and sacrifice a life for my own survival instinct.
The family on my father’s side were whalers.
The famliy on my mother’s side are hunters.
I’m proud of it. The sea and the mountains, it’s my ancestry.
I respect vegetarians, but only if they do it
for the love of animals,
and not because of a competition of superiority.
I gladly eat meat
if they think they are better than me.

– –

KNOKEN BRENGLISH

Do you think I write bad English?
I don’t need perfect grammar
to write
about your imperfections.

– –

HOT GARBAGE

I pulled the teeth
out of my ass
and now you can’t deepthroat
my hot anus cock

– –

DANIEL JOHNSTON (1961-2019)

Let’s pay tribute to the life and music of Daniel Johnston.
In normie life, he was downgraded to clean up
other people’s mess at McDonald’s.
As an artist, he was recognized by Kurt Cobain and David Bowie.
He suffered from mental illness, and was diagnosed
with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder.
At McDonald’s in the 80s, he recorded homemade cassettes
and gave them away for free to the customers.
A self-proclaimed amateur artist, who’s raw expression
impressed the professionals.
Listen to The Flaming Lips’ cover version tribute
of «True Love Will Find You in the End».
Listen to Teenage Fanclub with Jad Fair
perform «My Life is Starting Over Again».
Listen to «Wood Jackson» by David Bowie,
a song supposedly written about Daniel Johnston.
Listen to the late great Daniel Johnston:
Discovered covered.

– –

CONSPIRACY THEORIST

Everyone is a conspiracy theorist now.
Modern life is so dull and boring.
Whether people believe or not
in climate change, it’s a conspiracy theory
one way or the other.
It makes life more exciting than it is.
People sit in front of a flat screen,
friendless and unwanted,
the only sign of life
is a yawn in everyone they talk to.
They overlook the Grand Canyon
on the internet,
thinking that their existence is important,
that photoshop changes everything.

– –

WHAT I LEARNED ON THE INTERNET

I learned to write broken English,
I learned that the earth
is not a globe,
it is flat
and that there is no universe,
I learned that mathematics
would not have come into existence
if we knew from the beginning
that there is in nature
no exactly straight line,
no actual circle,
no absolute magnitude,
that it is precisely facts that do not exist,
only interpretations,
I learned that the moon
does not exist,
it is only a reflection
of a gigantic earth
which is much bigger than
we think,
I learned that the moon landing
was filmed by Stanley Kubrick
in a film studio
in Arizona,
and that Hiroshima was bombed
by a massive attack
of fire bombs
and not an atomic bomb,
I learned that nuclear bombs
does not exist,
it’s just a propaganda machinery
for fear mongering,
the oldest authoritarian trick
in the world,
I learned that science
is just another religion
for consumers in the material world,
I learned that chemtrails
from airplanes
are not exhaust
but chemicals they spray the sky with
for cloud seeding
and weather modification,
I learned that the only lesson
in life,
is to die with a knowledge
of nothing.

– –

SOLAR ECLIPSE

The sun is the eye of the universe,
the moon is the pupil. It’s God’s peep show.
I’M STARING AT YOU (with a dilated pupil),
he says, don’t think you can hide!

Optionally:

It is God’s eye,
the moon is the pupil,
he is watching us.

– –

GROW UP

I’m a living, breathing, thinking
human being, not a carrot.

– –

EVERYTHING IN ITS OWN TIME

Cars and computers
were not real.
But it is now.
God will be real
when it’s time.

– –

THE PLANDEMIC (JUST SOME THOUGHTS, I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO)

The difference between the Spanish flu and the Coronavirus
is that while the virus in 1918 made most people physically ill,
the virus of 2020 makes most people mentally ill.
It’s all in tune with our age of social media and cyberspace «reality»,
the climate change hoax and the fear mongering
and the health hysteria and the self-obsession.
Like the nazis in 1940, the madness of their beliefs went too far
and they attacked the world, and now the madness of modern culture
has reached a breaking point where it’s at war with itself.

– –

CORONAPHOBIA (MORE DISPOSABLE THOUGHTS)

People are easy to manipulate.
I remember when the smoking bans happened 15 years ago,
it took a few weeks of anti-smoking propaganda commercials on TV
to make people afraid of tobacco smoke.
And it was only the beginning.
Now people are not only afraid of smoking a cigarette
but also afraid of second hand smoke.
If people think that this virusphobia
is going to heal with a vaccine, then they need to think harder.
It has opened up a pandora’s box in people’s minds
and they will be sceptical of people who caugh
or look unhealthy or come too close
for the rest of their life.

– –

POPULAR THINGS I’VE SAID IN BROKEN ENGLISH ON YOUTUBE

«Is this the moment (How Not to Wake Up a Lioness!) when you realize that wild animals has a sense of humor. :D» (4,7k likes)

«Masterpiece. One of the greatest songs («What a Wonderful World» by Louis Armstrong) of all time.» (1,9k likes)

«How is it possible (Rambro, the Angry Ram) to be so violent and friendly at the same time.» (1,4k likes)

«Everything from pneumonia to car accidents has been diagnosed with the Coronavirus.
It’s why we trust the genius of modern doctors and scientists with our life. When they are so busy throwing darts,
they have to hit the bullseye once in a while.» (1,2k likes)

«He (Kanye West) was so moved by his own speech (in presidental rally) and talking about himself that he began to cry.
Not even Trump is that narcissistic.» (227 likes)

«R.I.P. I found out about his music (David Berman) just recently. He seemed classic human in a plastic modern world.» (193 likes)

«»The Final Cut» (by Pink Floyd) is a moody masterpiece.» (44 likes)

«It’s weird to see Robert Fripp in an «ordinary» setting (dancing to «Let’s Twist Again» with his wife Toyah).
His guitar playing and music is art on an Einstein level. It’s almost not human.» (34 likes)

«They can have my body. It belongs to this material world, just like a tree. They can cut it down.
But my mind is ever wandering and my soul is not of this world.» (20 likes)

«Me too. Yodeling may seem to be for ‘locals’, it’s not pop/rock but Franzl Lang is on par with Elvis Presley
and Edith Piaf and Frank Sinatra and Maria Callas. One of the greatest singers of all time.» (1 like)

– –

MORE POPULAR COMMENTS IN BROKEN ENGLISH

«David Icke has an exceptional mind.
He makes the people who are considered ‘intelligent and sucessful’ in society,
look like the retards they really are.»

«There’s no way back. I see people in their twenties now.
It’s the first generation who knows no life without technology.
And they have no personal thoughts or feelings about life or death or anything.
No imagination. It’s the first generation with 0 in IQ
where the only brainpower is in their cellphone.»

«During world war 2,
people walked straight into the concentration camps and the gas chambers
without resitance, because they did not think that humans could be so evil.
They did not think that doctors could do such inhuman atrocity,
while in reality the doctors were running the camps.
I think this is part of what makes this possible.
People think that doctors and hospitals are there to help you,
so they send their loved ones there with flu-like symptoms
and they do not return.»

«When I see the majority of people
adapt to quarantines and face masks and social distancing
without questioning the narrative,
I understand better how Adolf and Co. occupied Europe so easily.
In this way, I’ve been enlighted by the Coronavirus.»

«As far back as I can remember,
I hated the conformists and the normies.
I loved the hippies and the outlaws.
I never thought I would live in a Western culture where conformism
is as pronounced as it is now.
I thought it was over with when I was growing up in the 80’s.
Fascism, Nazism, I thought it was dead.
And now it’s here again, same shit/new wrapping.»

«Next up is mandatory diaper.
Just think about the bacilli we spread in public toilets
and toilets at workplaces.
Face mask, eye protection and a diaper.
Then you are dressed for the future.»

juli 12, 2019 - Posted by | New Adventures in Broken English

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